Sunday, August 29, 2010

It is secret? Is it safe?

I never was good at keeping a diary.  A while ago I went through my diaries from childhood and found them so empty that I actually threw them away because there was nothing in them worth keeping.  But lately I find myself wanting to write things that are more on the reflective side. Or the creative side.  But the question is...just who reads this thing anyways?  Who is my audience?  Perhaps I should begin each post with "Dear blogger".  Should I hide the blog under my mattress?  In the underwear drawer?  Naw...those are the first places people would look!!

I believe only my best friends and my husband are even aware of this little blog.  But I also think we as a society are growing so accustomed to sharing ourselves online, that we get lulled into a false sense of security that only people we care to share with will witness our online selves.  Those facebook posts with four letter words or questionable content; that picture after a little too much tequila; that profile picture of me, 6 months pregnant, flipping off the camera man.  Will I now add innermost thoughts to the online version of me...for anyone out there in the twisting nether of the interwebs to see?

I suppose I shall, come what may.

Monday, August 16, 2010

The Nursery Obsession: A journey nearing madness

Since the very moment I found out I was with child, I became obsessed with how to decorate the nursery. Well, if I am to be honest...it's something I've thought about plenty even before I knew we were expecting. DH along with many others have made such points as "the baby won't even use the room for the first year" and "by the time he cares what its decorated as, he'll have outgrown it and you'll have to do it over" and "but, it's yellow". To these naysayers I have three words. I. Don't. Care. It's my first (and possibly only) baby, and I want the room to be just so. Or, at least as "just so" as a tiny room on a non-designer budget can be.

When we first bought this little house, we thought that one little bedroom in particular would make a lovely nursery. In the meantime we used it as a guest bedroom/sewing room/dumping ground. During each other room's face lift, it carefully and selflessly offered a home to all the furniture, artwork and miscellaneous goodies that needed a place to stay. You may remember this little gem of a room from such posts as this and this.

DH has been amazingly tolerant of my obsession with this room's important future. He talked me out of some rather silly ideas by suggesting that he install crown molding. *Splash*!! It's my hearts desire to have crown molding in every major room in the house so I wasn't about to say no. And let me tell you something...installing crown molding is a bitch. I will be eternally grateful to DH for doing it.

Here he is, hard at work:


And I gotta say, I love the way it turned out. He's so good:


Soooo, the next step. I get many "what's your theme?" questions from folks who are thinking of gift ideas and such. I had a most perfect theme in mind for a girls nursery...that involved toile (love) and gingham, and whimsical art work. I didn't have many ideas for a boy, until some swatches of fabric arrived (I ordered them when I thought we were having a girl...that's a story for another time). Among them was this fabric. DH said "hey, I like that one!" and I thought...maybe I can have my toile nursery afterall!!! Inspiration #1 was born.

Inspiration #2 came in the form of this antique rocking chair, which incidentally my mother has a picture of HER mother being rocked in it by my great-great grandmother. It's like 100 years old and aside from needing reupholstery is in great shape:


The fabric makes me think of a whimsical, fantastical circus that might have come to town back in the day when great-great granny was rocking her first baby in this very rocker. So I'm thinking a bit vintage, a bit whimsical, a bit circus.

My darling mother in law suggested that she make a quilt that includes the fabric of choice and some others that she let me help select. I'm making curtains and probably some cute little pillows and a gingham dust ruffle for the crib mattress. Sewing projects!!

I wrestled over the furniture decision in a very big way. My original intent was to find an old fashioned wood crib on Craigslist and pair it with a shabby chic style dresser (that could double as a changing table). But the safety factor of old cribs hindered that plan...as did DH's distaste for the shabby chic style of furniture. In the end we got pieces from this set, which will work nicely and the stain of the wood is just right.

I also debated for a long time over the choice of rug. DH wanted to carpet the room, which I refused. I would have liked something subtle and a bit old fashioned looking like this pottery barn rug, but it was too expensive. I'd hate to clean spit up off of a 400 dollar rug. In the end we went with this option. A bit contemporary for my "theme"...but I figure it keeps it from being too serious, is a fun pick for a kid, and has all the right colors in it. DH likes it which is always a plus. And the price was right.

So much progress has been made, and still a bit left to do. DH installed a light in the closet (he's such a rockstar) and is in the midst of painting it, and we've got some shelving to install in there. I've moved on to the next mind boggling decision....artwork. I've got some ideas for a direction that are keeping with the theme.

Phew!! Stay tuned...next time there will be pictures of the final product!!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Time

It doesn't seem like its been over a year since my last blog entry, but low and behold it is. I've been distracted, initially by the lure of social networking (a.k.a. Facebook) and then by many other things that have taken up my time and energy.

In reflecting upon how time passes I've realized how little, in retrospect, the aspects of our day to day life matter. Sure, they seem of utmost importance at the time..."I have sooo much on my to-do list for the week" or "we are doing such and such this weekend" but when you look back upon the years do you remember those random weekends or to-do lists? Those particular stressful days at work that seemed so critical at the time? Those little obligations you rushed around for throughout each year? I find that I don't remember those things, which is almost surprising when I think about how much stress and worry I put into the details of day to day life.

In looking back upon years past, what really stands out are the more defining things. Where I lived, who my significant other was, where I worked...and of course the big events of the year. I can tell you about the vacations taken, if I moved, and if I changed jobs. I can tell you if I quit smoking, who I loved, who I lost. When considering any given year, its those things come to define that year for me. Not the little concerns.

When I think of 2004, the thing that defines it was our first trip to Europe. 2006 equals our wedding+honeymoon, and two moves to my memory. When thinking of 2007 I remember some important people I lost and buying our first house.

When looking back upon 2010, undoubtedly I'll think of it as the year of pregnancy. I found out I was pregnant early in February and we'll welcome our first baby in late October. Consequently much has been left undone this year as I navigate the waters of baking a baby...the joys of it and the array of discomforts. Little else has been in my mind other than this baby boy...looking forward to bringing him into the world and figuring out how the heck to take care of him without totally screwing him up.

So here I am. I've got no completed projects under my belt for this year (though the nursery - formerly known as the yellow room - is seeing some improvements; posts on that are forthcoming), my garden is overrun with weeds, and my laundry pile is literally up to my shoulders. I like to consider it practice for when the little guy is actually here and I have a better reason to let the to-do list go.

Yet something in me decided perhaps I should start this blog back up again. Perhaps I'll look back at my posts in a few years and instead of just thinking of this as the "year of pregnancy", I'll have more flavor and color to my memories of this time. For once time passes, you can't get it back.